June 26, 2013 - My parents' sixty-fourth wedding anniversary... and of course a big day as well for my partner Cindy and me.
I am someone who can say that I have been married three times, divorced once, legally considered single for 21 years except for those few days since 2008 when I was in California and now, after yesterday, considered married by the federal government and single by my home state. Quite the complicated scenario!
Regardless of all that, the historic milestones that were achieved yesterday actually affected my partner Cindy and me, and on a personal level. Usually, when another state offers marriage recognition, it is something we cheer for and of course we're grateful for in terms of our community and behalf of civil rights... but it affects us more on a professional level than on a personal one (given our work here at www.RainbowWeddingNetwork.com).
But yesterday's Supreme Court ruling is different. Today, for the full 24 hours and through into tomorrow, Cindy and I are in many respects again considered married. We will have certain federal rights & responsibilities, as of this moment... and our daughter has certain guaranteed protections. Perhaps we will be able to adopt again, and with more complete inclusion of both Cindy and I as the parents -equally- in the eyes of of the law.
More than that, it touches our hearts. To be recognized by our federal government means something. It is indeed a time to celebrate, to be grateful for those who have worked so hard on behalf of our community, and to look ahead to even brighter tomorrows.
And it is an achievement indeed, not just on behalf of the LGBT community, but on behalf of all individuals. The fact that our definition of love is evolving points to a higher degree of acceptance and respectfulness in our society. It is no longer common practice, at least in our nation, for fathers to sell their daughters into marriage, or for parents to arrange their children's unions, or for it to be unlawful for biracial couples to wed, or for women to be considered the property of their spouses. Yesterday's decisions point to the fact that, as a culture, we are transforming our idea of what relationships ideally can be.
June 26th, 2013 - A wonderful day to celebrate, on many levels, and for the joy of many hearts.