Gay Wedding Blog

Three years ago, my partner & I released a book called "My Dangerous Commute: Witnessing Gay Marriage Rights Across America."  We are soon going to re-release it; I am very proud of many of the insightful tidbits throughout.  Something about this particular short chapter seems an appropriate reminder these days, so I wanted to share...

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Chapter 22: "Layers of Shame"

My favorite camera cost about $20 through mail order. It’s made entirely of plastic. It has to be taped together to keep from falling apart in my hand. But it takes fantastic photographs. As my professor used to say, ‘A camera is just a sealed box that controls the flow of light.’ Any tool, through which we view the world, is like that. Whether it is the concept of current politics or the framework of our spiritual beliefs, or societal standards… the lenses through which we consider our surroundings are just that: lenses; filters. Whether we realize it or not.

Many within the LGBT community see the world in such a way. They’ve come to believe it’s not quite okay to hold hands in public, or that deep-down we are in fact sinners, or that we ought to remain somewhat invisible to spare the mainstream. To some degree, we’ve successfully internalized the prejudice. Note to those opposed to the gay lifestyle: Mission Accomplished.

Minorities do this to themselves, as do others who have felt less-than, or victimized or disempowered. It’s natural. And it can be silently unrecognized for lifetimes, like a thin haze in front of the eyes, virtually unseen. It can skew the way we interpret our own experience; our own reality. It can be passed down, through generations. And the result can be utterly detrimental, obviously, concerning the ability to envision a clear and justifiable reason for the desire for equality, fairness and non-discrimination. It can hinder an entire group’s collective ability to believe in itself.

Legalizing same-sex marriage presents the opportunity to heal at such a remarkable level, well below the surface. Individually and culturally. There are indeed broad implications.

Oscar Winner Jeremy Irons poses the question, with regard to gay marriage, "Could not a father marry his son?"

This kind of thought process continues to be a form of criminalizing the LGBT minority.  It really will be refreshing when the issue of LGBT equality is not overshadowed by comments of incest, pedophilia & bestiality. True equality will come to pass when such connotations do not cross anyone's mind.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/03/jeremy-irons-on-gay-marri_n_3009495.html

Article by Liz Goodwin / Yahoo's The Ticket

As the Supreme Court’s unpredictable swing vote, Justice Anthony Kennedy often finds himself the subject of scrutiny before big, controversial Supreme Court cases. But next week, when he hears arguments in two cases with the potential to transform the way gays and lesbians are treated in the country, Kennedy watchers have two landmark opinions written by the justice to mine for clues as to how he will rule.

Starting Tuesday, judges will hear oral arguments over whether California’s voter-approved ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, violates the constitutional rights of gay people in the state; and over whether the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act, which states that only marriages between people of the opposite sex are federally valid, is legal.

The former, called Perry v. Hollingsworth, could be especially significant as the justices, in theory, could either declare all state gay marriage bans unconstitutional—or say that gay couples have no constitutional claim to marriage at all.

Kennedy, a 76-year-old Sacramento native and Ronald Reagan appointee, most often votes with his four conservative colleagues. But the devout Catholic has broken with that pattern to side with the more liberal wing of the court in some key cases, such as when he affirmed Roe v. Wade’s holding that women have a right to abortions in 1992, and when he ruled in 2005 that states may not sentence criminals to death if they committed their crimes as juveniles.

READ MORE...

This story is so very heartfelt and touching!  It is wonderful that more and more parents (and medical professionals) are recognizing gender identity as a very real phenomenon.  Hopefully soon the language will evolve from calling it 'gender identification disorder' instead to something less like a disease or illness.  In my humble opinion, gender is a spectrum... and there is no wrong place to be on that spectrum.  -There is only the right place, for each individual and their own body and their own sense of self-expression, and of course their own happiness.

Read this touching article, watch the video... It's worth the few minutes!

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/colorado-transgender-girl-banned-grade-school-bathroom/story?id=18607443

Lately we've had a good deal of press coverage for our ongoing tour of LGBT Wedding Expos!  Deservedly so, many might say :)  We are similar to a Rock n Roll Tour as we make our way from city to city:  Las Vegas, Tacoma, NYC, Philadelphia, Chicago - Outrageous fun, gay flair and changing the world!

Thanks for all the support you've given us!  Enjoy the articles below-

http://www.epgn.com/view/full_story/21839902/article-Resources-abound-at-wedding-expo?instance=home_news

http://www.lvrj.com/living/-same-love-same-rights-enjoys-new-venue-191579401.html

It is SO EXCITING to see momentum like this (statement below) as we move ahead with EQUALITY for all LGBT Americans, and those who wish to become citizens of our country!  Again, our applause to President Obama for his vision and commitment to articulating the cause of LGBT equality as being a CIVIL RIGHTS ISSUE.  Period.  Exciting history is being made!

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January 29th, 2013:  National lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) rights organizations, including the National Center for Lesbian Rights, today released a joint statement reiterating the call for a comprehensive immigration policy that ensures fair and just treatment for all those currently impacted by our failed immigration policy. The statement includes the following:

"Any legislation must include the ability of couples in same-sex relationships to sponsor their spouse or permanent-partner in the same way opposite-sex couples have long been able to under current immigration law.

We stand shoulder-to-shoulder with those striving for and dreaming of a nation that embraces all who come here seeking a better life. We look forward to working with Congress, the White House and every community harmed by our broken immigration system to finally achieve the comprehensive reforms we all so desperately need."

“Our journey is not complete until our gay brothers and sisters are treated like anyone else under the law — for if we are truly created equal, then surely the love we commit to one another must be equal as well...”  President Obama's words resonate like wildfire inspiring pride and eager anticipation of the road that lies ahead. The moment was almost surreal today as we sat and watched live coverage of the inauguration.  For the first time in history an American President is including the gay community in his definition of equality.  He acknowledged our struggle at Stonewall and has committed to helping create an America where LGBT citizens are truly equal.  It is both awe inspiring and reaffirming to see the progress that has been made!

There are those who like to say that they do legitimate work in the world, and those who actually do.  ...Which one are you?  (Which do you think we've been dealing with a lot here at RWN this week??)

Carrying on the illusion of doing that work takes such a lot of time & energy...  Why not simply get down in the dirt and actually make a difference in the first place??

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As we often say in our speeches at our LGBT Wedding Expos throughout the nation, if more facets of the community simply connected and worked together with a team-oriented perspective, sincerely mindful of the ultimate goals rather than the glory or the bragging rights or even sometimes the paycheck... our minority would have achieved full marriage & family rights by now.

Our thanks to our friends at GLYPH FINE PRESS in Havre de Grace, MD!

Not only are owners Joseph & Don choosing to exhibit & showcase their invitations at our upcoming Baltimore LGBT Wedding Expo... they have also taken solid initiative in helping to promote the event.  Networking to the max!

Recent display ads for Glyph (as seen for instance in Gay Life) promote their studio, signature design talents & art gallery... and the ad also invites couples to visit them in person at the upcoming Expo, January 27th at the Tremont Suites Hotel.

This extended exposure for us, as producers of the Expo, is of course much appreciated!  It's also a great reminder to small business owners that cross-promoting within any of your marketing endeavors is always a plus.

THANK YOU, Joseph & Don!  We look forward to seeing you later this month in Baltimore!www.glyphdg.com

This is an interesting read...  Includes some exciting quantitative numbers about the economic impact of marriage seen in states like NY and Massachusetts, and anticipated numbers now that marriage rights have passed in Maine, Maryland and Washington.

Also, a more human side to the article too, in the comments from local Maine business professionals.  And a brief interview with RainbowWeddingNetwork co-founder, Cindy Sproul!

Read on!  And remember, our Portland ME Gay & Lesbian Wedding Expo is set for Sunday April 7th 2013 at the Italian Heritage Center!

http://www.seacoastonline.com/articles/20121209-NEWS-212090349